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Saturday, April 28, 2007

And furthermore 'Bana'...

Oh, by the way ‘Bana’, we haven’t mentioned it before because, unlike you, we’re not in the habit of bragging or speaking for other people, but perhaps now might be an appropriate time to mention it. There is a certain member of the Whitelaw Towers staff who happens to have a nephew currently serving in the Australian SAS Regiment, so you should be careful with your big noting about your military ‘achievements’ and ‘elite’ status because the real blokes don’t take too kindly to phonies passing themselves off as soldiers.

Apart from being a serious criminal offence, impersonating a member of the armed forces or misrepresenting your service record is considered extremely poor form and if you had even half a functioning brain you’d be cautious about bringing yourself under scrutiny.

There are only two ways you could have held the rank of ‘Trooper’ in the Australian Army. One is being in the SASR, the other is in the RAAC. Now you are clearly not Special Forces material, despite your claims to ‘elite’ status, so you must have been a Black Cap, a Tanker, today’s equivalent to Cavalry. This fits because we could not imagine anyone with your piss poor attitude being in any hard core, foot slogging Infantry Unit.

Besides, in today’s Australian Army there are only two units which could seriously be considered truly ‘elite’ in the real sense of the word, and those are the SASR (Special Forces) and 3RAR (Para/Light Infantry). Today’s armoured units are certainly descended from elite Cavalry units but their modern mechanised role differs greatly from their traditional Attack and Guards duties back when they rode horses. They are more appropriately regarded as mobile and self supporting artillery.

Now this is where it gets interesting because the Unit with the most battle honours, the “most highly decorated unit” is the 1/15th Royal New South Wales Lancers but they are a Reserve Unit. The only Regular Army Armoured Corps Regiments, so far as we can establish, are the 1st Armoured Regiment (Armoured), the 2nd Cavalry Regiment (Recon), the 3/4th Cavalry Regiment (Light Armoured) and the 2/14th Light Horse Regiment (Recon).

Out of these units it is the 2/14th Light Horse Regiment that has the highest number of Battle Honours. So Bana is this the Regiment you claim to have trooped the colours for?

Waiting…